I guess the most honest way to say it is ... sometimes I dislike being with my child. Is that too honest? He is overly talkative almost to the point of disregarding anyone else might even be in the room with him, he is loud and I mean with noises and speech. Shooting sounds and just strange repetitive noises and when I say repetitive I mean I will say “Parker, that is enough” and it is as if I am whispering. This will happen 3 or 4 times until I am raising my voice “THAT IS ENOUGH!” and only then do I get a, “huh?” It makes me have little to no patience as if I can’t even hear myself think. Parker has a hard time keeping on track. Multiple choices confuse him or consecutive directions are almost to much to handle. I always thought myself to be a rather patient person, with my children that is, but in the last 3 or so years I have turned into the least patient person I know. I feel trapped and alone and angry with myself for not knowing how to correct and fix this problem with my child. To make it even worse sometimes he is fine. Perfectly normal, pleasant, sweet and charming. His heart is filled with kindness from here to eternity, he is amazingly brave and charismatic. He can steal a scene and make you laugh at the drop of a goofy hello. On a bad day? I don’t recognize him, I feel frustrated, humiliated, scared, helpless and hopeless.
MY CHILD IS CHEMICALLY SENSITIVE he has adhd and is MINE!
I would like to say that with this additive/toxin free diet life is roses and all is solved, but that is NOT the case. Although it has cleaned him up and I have noticed a dramatic difference in Parkers demeanor I am now facing new issues with my son. I can’t put my finger on what or why, but I am at a stand still. He recently started this self hatred stuff. Even the smallest things will send him into great turmoil and he will say things like “I can NEVER do anything right...I hate myself” or “I am so stupid” and hits himself in the head with a closed fist. With his adhd we never had aggression in our spectrum and now it is starting. I am scared because at age 7 he is getting big. Do I have teen years coming my way with physical aggression like punching holes in walls that I need to be weary of? Should I have him talk to someone? Is this normal? I am a alternative to anger Mom and like to talk to my children and get to the root of the behavior, but even he does not know what the cause is. He tells me he wants to stop he is just so angry. I know he is sensitive child emotionally and he is having a bit of an issue with a child at school. This friend likes to tattle on Parker for not keeping on track, but as the Teacher explains it he almost preys on Parker waiting for parker to do something, so he can tattle. I know this child well and he is NOT a bully and his parents are good people and good parents. Parker is just so sensitive and DOES NOT like getting in trouble. So much so he hides under his desk at school and fears going now. He comes home in tears at least 2 to 3 days a week and has begun the aggressive behavior. I AM TIRED and resort to tears 9 times out of 10. I am just wishing today I could have the “normal” child. Although I am madly in love with him I am just wanting a Mommy free be me day.

What am I sick of today?
Being responsible
Googling behavior problems
Cleaning up pee on the bathroom floor
Fixing the dishes when my husband puts them in the dishwasher the wrong way
Reading Putt Putt Little Red for the trillionth time
and broken cars